• Andrew Playmer

Season 10, Part 3: Attack and Destroy God

PREVIOUSLY: S10 Part 2: Mills, Wimdy?


As the emergency sirens began to echo across the New York skyline, the Mills closed the blinds to their shared apartment and opted to wind down for bed, rather than endure the Shelled Ones taunts. The attempt at peace was quickly shattered as the team group text lit up with messages from a long idle number:


The team rushed to the living room and watched in awe as their former captain, Dominic Marijuana, took the field as part of the Hall Stars. Facing off against The Shelled One’s Pods, Dominic was united with his brother Randall, each blazing home run after home run to damage the nut.


In the bottom of the third inning, a rogue umpire collected a debt and incinerated Sebastian Telephone (for the second time). Sebastian’s instability chained to Randall Marijuana, enraging Dom. The Mills group text lit up again, this time from a number that hadn’t texted in eight seasons:

Scrap Murphy, who had never batted during his pitching career with the Millennials, hit a home run for the Hall Stars in his first at bat.


In the bottom of the ninth inning, as birds swarmed the air, Dominic Marijuana took the plate once again. After hitting six consecutive foul balls off saboteur pitcher Jaylen Hotdogfingers, as the Shelled One declared “I AM INFINITE. I AM THE SNACK”, and as the Hall Monitor silently approached, Dominic Marijuana hit a solo home run for 2,039,516 damage, defeating the Pods.


As the Hall Monitor cronched the Shelled One, Millennials fans around the world cheered in unison.


Dominic Marijuana - our Dominic Marijuana - had killed a God.


As the Mills organized a late night celebratory bodega run, one final text came in the group chat:


NEXT: S10 Part 4 - The Real Blessing

Recent Posts

See All